Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it”
Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect.
To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.
On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.
I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…
Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.
The lengths we go for music.
Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.
One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”
And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:
[stifled giggling]
[reeeeeeally deep breath]
[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.
In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”
FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.
This is the best band post
Everyone else go home
Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this
which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,
that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that
Who does that?
This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.
Julius IdontgivaFucik
More like Julius Fuckit
Pyrozod’s tags for this were too hilarious not to share
this post is so fucked up because whenever it comes up on my dash i will without fail spend at least 30 seconds dragging a sponge around my screen like an idiot. no matter how many times i see this post it still gets me and now im about to do it again for good measure
Alkibiades is my favourite male character in AC: Odyssey, without a shadow of a doubt, I love that horny bastard, he’s like the only male npc I ever romance just because he’s insatiable and its hilarious to me
I mean he’s a lying little shit, but I can’t even be mad, like every single quest is so obviously a set up for something but I just keep doing them because he’s such a git, plus every time Kassandra realises shes been tricked she just gets progressively more resigned to the fact and that’s so funny for some reason
“My favorite part of an Assassin’s Creed game isn’t the epic story, or the thrill of running across the rooftops of a huge, bustling city. It’s definitely not all of the neck stabbing. Instead, the moments that really stick with me are the quieter ones, where I have the chance to really appreciate the detail that’s gone into creating these historical settings, whether it’s ancient Rome or industrial era London. Unfortunately, often those moments are disrupted when I accidentally enter a restricted area, or when the story forces me to assassinate someone to proceed.”
“Today sees the release of a new “discovery tour” for Assassin’s Creed Origins, and it feels like it was designed specifically for players like me. A completely separate mode, the educational tour does away with the violence and story that are at the core of Origins, and instead gives players a guided look at the realities of ancient Egypt, where the game takes place. It’s sort of like one of those audio tours in museums — except here you can climb a pyramid or ride a boat down the Nile while you learn.” Continue reading
